Is “love” Worth It?
Call me crazy, old-fashioned, foolish, or downright stupid, but I must say that I love “love”. I think that we all should, but what do I know? (LOL)
Despite all of my negative run-ins with “love”, I’ve nothing but positive things to say about it. Not necessarily the people that I shared the “love” with, but definitely the concept of “love”. Yesterday, on Twitter (HINT: Follow me), I became engaged in a conversation on whether or not people believe in “love”; and if they do, is it truly worth it? I couldn’t help but notice that I received far more negative responses, than the positive that I was hoping for.
Thus, I became sad.
Thus, I began to think. We all know what happens when I begin to think. (If you don’t know, now you know).
“What is “love”? How do you define “love”? Why is it important? Why should you care?” ß These questions came to my mind quite easily as I reminisced on all that I knew, learned, speculated, and believed about “love”.
I’ve always liked to have some sort of definition to something that I believe in. Whether it’s one derived from a dictionary, or from personal experiences. It’s always good to know. So here you are:
According to Dictionary.com, using love as a noun means a profoundly tender and passionate affection for another person.
As a verb: to have profoundly tender, passionate affection for (another person).
Personally, I have always seen “love” as something more than mere words, affection, or tenderness. To be honest, a lot of people express their “love” in a lot of different ways. By that, I mean that different situations call for a different display.
A single-father, raising young males in the crime filled streets of a neighborhood may be a bit sterner than the kids would like, but does he “love” them less than a mother in a prosperous, and safe neighborhood “love” her children? However, I do not believe (nor will I ever condone) a “love” (ha) demonstrated by physical abuse.
Let’s talk relationships, or lack thereof (for whatever your case may be). One young lady expressed to me that she lacked faith in the males of our generation, and that she stopped believing in “love”, or ever sharing it with someone. I didn’t know what to say to her. All I could do is apologize for her rough times and urge her to never let her faith waver.
What would life be like if “love” was nonexistent? I pray that none of us have to experience that.
SEEING IS BELIEVING
Let’s not just think that “love” is this abstract feeling. It is, in fact, something that you can truly feel. I did not believe this until I experienced it for myself. I see a lot of “love” in the air, everywhere I go. Whether it’s the newlyweds excited over the idea of crafting their lives together. Or maybe it’s the student that loves community service so much that they are willing to dedicate themselves in support of humanity. Or maybe it’s that young mother whose fear of having her first child is washed away as she lays eyes upon what she brought into the world for the first time. She begins to “love”, she begins to believe, and she begins to have faith.
“Love” is a l helluva lot deeper than those eight letters that most people sprout out. If anything, my belief is that real “love” can never truly be understood, only shown, believed, or demonstrated. Never to be fully understood, but always to be admired, believed in, and appreciated. Now, hearing someone tell you “I love you” is indeed wonderful. Having someone show you that they “love” you is powerful! It’s like the difference in hearing that someone is cute, and then actually seeing that they are indeed attractive. (We’ve all experienced that LOL).
Back on topic.
I am not attempting to change minds or beliefs. I am simply asking you to think. Believe. Have faith.
Yes, there will be ups and downs.
No, it won’t be easy.
Yes, you can do it.
The way I see it, it’s all about having a “poised patience”. There are a lot of folks that speak on what they want, and yet never go out and get it. (Some people just refuse to be real with themselves, but that’s a different post for a different day). I see on my TL, or Facebook feed, hundreds (if not thousands) of posts for people looking for “love”, affection, someone that cares about them. That’s nice. However, when asked what they are doing about it, they say nothing. Some of us are shy, and don’t like approaching others. That’s somewhat understandable. A lot of us, however, surround ourselves with an impenetrable bubble that we let no one into, and yet complain that everyone is the same. (The age old “men ain’t shit, women ain’t shit” mentality that has plagued our lives. It’s not that men or women in general are not of a good quality. But if you keep that wall up, have your mind filled with assumptions, and disregard TRUE attempts at getting to know you for who you are, what do you expect? What should you expect?
Albert Einstein once said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over, and expecting different results.”
I urge everyone to not give up on “love”. To be patient, but to be ready and open to any and all opportunities that may come your way. Hell, you just might surprise yourself. To be protected, and yet unafraid of taking a chance. Chances are, you will not get it right the first time, but that’s what we call a lesson.
I’ve been hurt before. I’ve done the hurting. I’ve been hurt by people that I never expected it from. And likewise, I’ve hurt people that I never believed I could hurt. Life happens! But when life gives you lemons, make some lemonade and sell that shit! I hurt now, but I am still here, believing, hoping, praying, focused, and yet aware of “love”. We may not always “love” people, but we should be reminded that “love”, in and out of itself, is blind. It can be used to abuse as well and to heal.
That comfort zone of yours could very well be the reason you sit in the house listening to Drake all weekend. No, chances are you will not receive a knight in shining armor, or a model straight from the runway.
“Love” is real. I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t believe it. Sometimes, I could just reach out and touch it, caress it, and tell it that I’d never abuse it. I pray for those that misuse it. There are some phenomenal men and women out there with distrusting hearts, and honestly, can we blame them? And yet, there are those that have been hurt, countless times it seems, and yet they stand once more, because in reality, nothing can compare to the feeling of love, and of being loved. Trust me.
Would you prefer to be open to love, or have a house full of cats? To have love, or a life that always feel like it’s missing something? To have love, or to have nothing?
So is “love” real? Yes.
Is “love” worth it? Yes, without a question. All it takes is a bit of believing.
I always say that I have more faith in “love” than I will ever have in mankind, and I stand by that.
Lastly, a beautiful quote by Mother Theresa, “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”
And from Lao Tzu, “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”